Bisphosphenate Infusion & Back to Jumping!

Little did we know what wonders awaited us in Aswan!!!

After docking in Esna overnight, having passed through the lock shortly after dinner, we awoke to find ourselves docking in Aswan! We'd set sail from Esna in the early morning. Unfortunately the day didn't start off on the 'best foot' as such. I'd managed to avoid it so far but I this morning of all mornings I woke up with elevated pain levels. We headed downstairs to meet the gang and disaster struck, a careless passenger knocked my crutch which subsequently knocked my bad foot. Luckily, I had the best team, as Ali and Mahmood joined us Walid explained what had just happened and they were mortified. Luckily we all got to the bus, with them carrying me in my chair that is. I then had a chance to rest in the minibus and let the Oxy kick in. Our first stop was the Great Dam, still feeling rough I opted to admiring from the minibus. By this point both Mum and I had grown really fond of Mahmood and Ali and the feeling was mutual. Refusing to leave my side Ali stayed with me and although we couldn't speak the same language the charades were going well and I could see he was clearly upset by the passenger knocking into me and how unfair the condition is. Mahmood and he were not going to be defeated though!

The next stop was Philae Temple... In order to get there you have to charter a small boat, which involves haggling with the locals who drive the boats, luckily Walid took care of all this. However unable to hop I was wondering how this was going to be achieved... I never should have doubted Ali and Mahmood! Between them, Walid and a friendly local they lifted me in my chair onto the boat! Sitting on the boat was a lovely respite from the heat with a beautiful breeze as we were whizzing across the lake. Reaching Philae we hit another snag.... there were steps from the boat to the jetty and then up to the gang plank and then up on to the Island! Again, refusing to be defeated Walid, Ali, Mahmood and another local carried me the whole way!! Philae was beautiful and to learn it had all been relocated from the original Philae Island, stone for stone!

Unfortunately, as most CRPS sufferers know your drugs can cause raises in body temperature. Unfortunately what you may not know is that on occasion (it is not a REGULAR side affect) the condition can cause changes within the sympathetic nervous system which controls things like heart rate and core temperature... Mine has been elevated since the CRPS moved up my arm into my shoulder as such my core temperature runs at 39 degrees C which is very high. Unfortunately top that up with a rise from Oxy and mine goes well over 40 at which the body functions begin to struggle, namely temperature regulation. On top of this, this was also the hottest day so far, 40 degrees C already and it wasn't even 12pm!!! Luckily Philae has a lot of shade, we were about half-way round when I started to feel incredibly rough, Mum kept giving me water but I could feel myself struggling. As such we finished off the tour of the Island and repeated the getting on the boat comedy act!! This point seems fitting to pay tribute to the Egyptian people, they are phenomenal! They just want to help!! 

We reached the jetty at the other side of the lake and for the last time repeated the wheelchair off the boat scenario! I still can't believe how they did it! They were amazing!! I think at this point Walid had begun to realise I wasn't feeling right and suggested we for-go the Quarry. Looking back I think I was beginning to suffer from a pretty nasty case of heatstroke! Reaching the boat the whole team were mustered and not only got me back on to the boat in the wheelchair but up the stairs to our room and helped me onto the bed. I was feeling so sick and was in so much pain I was so pleased we were able to collapse in a heap!!! 

Luckily because we ha an extra day in Aswan we had been able to plan a trip to the Old Cateract Hotel wear Agatha Christie had written part of the fabulous Death on the Nile! We were also going to Kitchener Island, the botanical gardens set up by Lord Kitchener. We headed down to the boat which would take us out to Kitchener Island and set sail. Upon reaching the Island we were met by a very lively gentleman named Mr Mohamed who turned out to be the curator of the Gardens! Mum was in her element, it was hilarious as Mr Mohamed got super excited about having a fellow gardener. Walid, Ali, Ahmed and I were laughing as we wandered round, don't get me wrong it is is stunning and definitely worth a visit, but I have never been able to get excited about plants! 

Leaving Kitchener Island we went past the Aga Khan's mausoleum built for him near his beloved home down on the bank of the Nile. Turning around the headland we came to the Old Cataract, it was beautiful! Unfortunately it was too many stairs to reach the hotel from its own jetty so we docked up river and drove down to the hotel. Tea on the terrace was incredible, the view was stunning and the food amazing! We left through the hotel lobby and were flawed by the beauty of the hotel! It's definitely on our return trip plan!

Heading back to the boat we were sad to think that this was our penultimate night. As we had decided to sail back downstream rather than leave the boat at Aswan we were lucky enough to have time to relax on the boat in the sun, which made the thought of leaving much harder... When we arrived back in Luxor we were able to add in the Luxor Museum and the Souk. The museum was amazing, so so so much history and the skill of the Ancient Egyptians was second to none! The Souk was of course fabulous as well, so rich in colours and smells and the most beautiful wears! I could have spent a whole day there! Heading back to the boat we were somewhat disheartened realising we were leaving the next day... Sat on the roof of the boat in the dark looking out over Luxor Temple I realised I could never love a place as much as I love Egypt. Waking up the next day I was heart broken heading back to the airport was horrible, not only because we were leaving but because of the flight. I have to say that despite flying a few times I still struggle, the pain still takes my breath away. But this trip out of all of them was the one most worth the pain!

If you get the chance to go to Egypt please DON'T HOLD BACK!! It is amazing, beautiful, grand and unbelievably welcoming. All they want is for us to return, they hate daesh more than we do. I can honestly say I have not felt safer anywhere in the world. Don't let fear rule your life, or they win.... Also if we let our disabilities dictate where we go or what we do our disabilities beat us and for me? That is NOT an option. This is a part of who I am but Mum and I proved that by doing this trip, you can do almost anything. Yes you have to be prepared and pick your agent carefully but it can be done, particularly in a country like Egypt where all they want to do is help... Please don't let it stop you!

Traditionally  many would cruise down to Aswan and head home or onward from there. Due to the CRPS we had decided to stay on the boat and cruise back up to Luxor and head home from there. The added an extra two days to our trip, but it was totally worth it as it meant we didn't have to rush anything. This second day on the boat meant that it was time for the Valley of the Kings!! I had missed this spectacle on a previous trip as I had opted to stay with my friends at the hotel when we had travelled to Hurgarda with my school.

Getting up early has never been a favourite of mine but I was beginning to realise that this trip was going to require it, and with good reason, starting out early means beating the heat! Rather groggy and after only two cups of coffee we headed to the minibus and set off with Mahmood and Ali in tow. Driving through Luxor and over the bridge to the West Bank was like driving through two totally different places. Luxor is a wonderful bustling city constantly moving, in contrast the West Bank is full of farmlands and small villages. The land is split into small farms to support the locals. Reaching the road to the Valley of the Kings we stopped momentarily to look at the house Carter had lived in when he was looking for Tut's Tomb. I surprised to find that this was still a fair distance from the Valley. The investment from UNESCO has meant that each of the main tombs and attractions has a visitor centre and added security. Reaching the visitor centre Walid went to speak to the guards to see if we could drive up to the base of the Valley. They said no so we passed through the visitor centre, which wasn't a bad thing as they had the most beautiful perspex model showing the layout of the valley and how deep into the mountain side each of the tombs goes. They also had a beautiful tape running showing the original footage of Carter finding Tut's Tomb. Moving through the visitor centre we found small motorised trains which we all climbed into to head to the base of the Valley. I surprised that the Valley was already stiflingly hot, I didn't dare to think how hot it would be in the afternoon! We reached the next gate where we found a bag drop designed for camera's, this surprised Mum too as it hadn't been that long since she had visited, it transpired that you now can't take pictures in the tombs in order to try and help preserve the colours. We moved into the shade and Walid talked us through the history of the Valley and the tombs that have been found... so far... turns out they are still finding them!

We were only visiting three as Walid said many have similar paintings so he chose three of the best. We headed into the first after much muttering about Mahmood accompanying us. It was beautiful, so humbling to think that this had been done so many years ago.  Heading to the second both Ali and Mahmood came with us as this one had steps down to the burial chamber. I sent Mum down as 'advanced party' to see if it was worth it as we were both conscious of the heat and the effort both were putting in. We decided that it probably wasn't so Ali, Mahmood and I waited at the top, communicating through charades we had a laugh whilst waiting and I instantly felt a kinship with them both. Mum rejoined us and we headed to the final tomb close to the entrance to the Valley. The one thing that surprised me was the size of the tombs, given the earlier Pharaohs tombs, the beauty of the tombs was mind blowing. 

Heading out the Valley we were all chatting and laughing about the trip. The next stop was Hatshepsut's Temple. Unlike other Egyptian Temples this one was built into the side of the mountain. After years of restoration all three levels are now open. Some of the original paintings are still intact and again the beauty was breath taking. When we arrived there was the usual security to pass through, Mum and I were becoming more impressed with each site we visited, I can honestly say I have never felt safer! As the temple had ramps I insisted on using my scooter. Passing through security we had another little train ride. Mahmood and Ali tried to make Walid get me on the train with the scooter. I pointed out that this was impractical and I would be fine getting from there to the temple. Needless to say the train beat me and there were stood there smiling waiting for me. We wandered round the bottom level admiring the painting which have been roped off to protect them. Heading to the second level we managed to get up on to the ramp to the second level where we found more carving and paintings along with a 'side' temple. Here Mahmood and one of the locals (who look after the site) had quite a lively discussion whilst he looked at my scooter with interest, my guess is they haven't seen one before... Now disability should never stop people but I know it does. It makes life not only awkward but incredibly expensive too. I will admit that without help this trip would be very difficult, but NOT impossible. In order to head up to the next level we had to go up a small step so I stepped off the scooter and they lifted it up. Along with carving and paintings the final level had the most beautiful view out over the west bank to the Nile.

Heading back down from the temple and back to the boat we stopped briefly to admire the Colossus, which they have now found originally guarded the doors to a temple, I opted to stay in the minibus as I had got a bit too hot and bothered. Upon our return to the boat sensing I was a bit fragile Ali and Mahmood insisted on carrying me down two flights of stairs and a further flight down to the gang plank to the boat! They are honestly amazing people!! We were then able to flop and relax as we headed upstream to Aswan before docking on the far side of the lock, yes there's a lock on the Nile. The next day we woke up on the move Edfu. Walid had warned us that most people take a horse and cart to the temple but as I had already mentioned I was struggling with the welfare side of this he had booked us a car. Don't get me wrong they do the best for their animals given their means but I didn't want to be a part of it. The Edfu temple was smaller than some but still mind-blowing what and how they achieved was just incredible. Unlike some of the others the Edfu temple had been severely defaced, unfortunately due to religious wars and persecution people had taken refuge in the temples, claiming Sanctuary. However instead of being grateful for the Sanctuary given to them by entering their predecessors temples they defaced them as the perceived the images to be sacrilegious... The irony wasn't lost on me! Upon returning to the boat we enjoyed another leisurely afternoon on the boat watching the beauty of the Nile pass by! We docked briefly at Kom Ombo whilst the other tourists went to explore we had the luxury of relaxing as we were able to visit it on our way back to Aswan, dedicated to two gods (apparently quite common) the temple shows one of the earliest examples of a 365 day calendar! 

So to make the trip even more challenging Mum and I had a free morning before flying down to Luxor.  So what did we decide to do? Ride out to the Pyramids!!! Mum had done some research and as expected alot of trip advisor reviews were slating the conditions and the way the horses were treated but one came out with a reasonable reviews. Now when looking at animal welfare in countries like Egypt you have to remember that these animals are their livelihoods not pampered pets like ours. They want the best for their animals but it is through them that they can feed their families, in the most part they do their best by the animals and they work closely with veterinary practices offering help and support The biggest problem they face is the reduction in Tourist numbers.... Fears are unfounded!!!! I felt safer in Egypt than I do here!! They want tourism, they like us, they want us there! 

We arranged it with the owner and he sent a taxi. Now the taxi was a very beaten up Cairo Taxi not the flashy ones used by the tour operators. The security at the hotel were very careful about all of this and gave us the direct number for the armed officer on site, took copies of the mans license and ID and spoke to the owner of the stables. Once they finally decided they were happy for us to go we were on our way. I must admit it was daunting but my god it was exciting! We arrived and they headed off to get the horses ready. We headed out with me on a lovely Chestnut and Mum on a lovely Black Arab. We could tell that the horses knew where they were going and weren't awfully enthusiastic about the whole affair. As it was the first time back in the saddle after my Labrinthitis I didn't want to push it so we just walked but my god the view of the Pyramids!!! It was definitely the BEST view. 

Returning to the stables the taxi returned for us and took us back to the hotel, no fuss, not scary just a taxi in a crazy city! Then we had to face up to the scary thought of the flight to Luxor. 

Now the journey to the airport was fab and Mostafa was wonderful. Upon getting to the airport the pandemonium began. We were approached by the Air Egypt Desk manager who spoke to Mostafa in Arabic. It transpired that they were having a tantrum about my scooter going air-side. Eventually after lots of arguments and some pretty disgraceful behaviour towards me I had to let them wrap and check my scooter and go into my chair. The stress triggered the CRPS and I became a shaking wreck! Worried they might not let me on the flight Mum pilled me full of drugs and covered me up in blankets (luckily the aircon made the airport cold!). Tucked away in the Business Class lounge I tried to get the shakes under control, managing a bit. Having taken my nortriptyline I started to feel like i could doze which helped reduce the shakes. Getting on the flight I tried to concentrate on just getting through the hour. dozing slightly did seem to help BUT I did notice that the effect from the pressurisation of the cabin was much more in the smaller plane... LESSON 5 - Bigger planes are better!!! 

Getting through the hour a shaky mess about to throw up land in Luxor... I cannot praise the ground crew, airport staff, Discover Egypt Reps enough. They were all air-side ready to meet us, our cases were gathered up and taken to the mini-bus, we were scooped up too and I was able to curl up in the Mini-bus... Not the best start to our Luxor Leg... We were introduced to Walid who was to be our guide throughout the remainder of the trip. In true Egyptian Style he had rung ahead and arriving at where the boat was moored we were met by the ENTIRE deckcrew. Without allowing me to argue they put me in my chair and carried me down 3 flights of stairs and on to the boat! Following us with the luggage the remaining crew came on board. Ash, our Discover Egypt Rep, got us all settled in and we headed to the room. Taking a breath one of the dining staff pooped up insisting on us having dinner so we went for the Chicken. Appering with the food a short time later not only did we have Chicken but Nicoise Salad and pudding?! Stuffing in as much as we could we headed to bed... 

Waking up the next day with the Nile floating past your bedroom window was very surreal but magical! Mum had already tootled off to explore and look at rooms as our twin was tiny! In the end she came back and said that we were going to upgrade to a suite. It was the most practical decision. Moving to the new room we were pleased to find a small sitting room area, bedroom, bathroom and most importantly the small balcony!! Once we were settled we went up to the pool deck to chill before our evening tour of Karnak and Luxor Temple... Meeting Walid in reception we were ready to set off, the surprise for us was that we had been assigned 2 deckhands who were coming with us to help! Taking the scooter we headed off in our mini-bus, reaching Karnak we pilled out with the scooter with my little 'entourage' :) Passing trough the security we headed into the visitor centre which was scooter friendly. However, the disabled access door was locked and Walid headed off like a man on a mission to find the 'Key Holder'. Opening the door both Mahmood and Ali bolted off to find me a way down on the the esplanade. Originally there had been local houses where this beautiful Granite Esplanade now was. UNESCO had spent lots of time and money on setting up the sites but have pulled funding since the revolutions. All I can say is TWATS! Egypt and these beautiful site need protecting they need modernising and they need funding for the ongoing excavations! Anyway, mini rant over, moving in to Karnak I was completely overwhelmed... It is beautiful, mind-blowing, imposing and delicate all at once!! There's just no way to take it all in in one go, I have to go back!! LESSON 6 - Scooters go around Karnak! Whoop!! 

Heading to the mini-bus to head to Luxor Temple still in shock from the beauty of Karnak, realising that Mahmood and AlI had no water we gave them one of ours. Arriving at Luxor Temple we all pilled out for our next adventure. Finding a 'wheelchair access' ramp (which was horrendously steep) we headed down, laughing our heads off! Again I was swept awaay by the temple. The thought that all of this was created thousands of years ago is just incredible! And even more amazing things (including 2,500 statues the month before we arrived) are being discovered all the time! We need to support this! This is world heritage, this is advanced life whilst we were still hiding in caves!!!! Heading back to the boat memorised by the sites and my team <3 Mum and I hid in our cabin to avoid the belly dancing, reflecting on our fabulous evening! Our Nile adventure was well and truly under way.... 

Wow, its been so long since I wrote an update...

The CRPS now covers almost the whole of my left hand side... If you're new to this or looking for answers, rest assured this doesn't happen to most people with CRPS. Every case is individual so don't panic!! 

My treatment plan now looks like it will include a Neuro-Spinal Modulator... This is a hefty op and it hasn't been confirmed yet, but the Neurology team are looking into it... I've had the MRI to check there is enough space for the implant and I am meant to be seeing the Psychologist at the end of the month. Now I don't have the best track record with Psychologists as I am forth-right and a pragmatist. Fingers Crossed. 

Now the most recent adventure... EGYPT!!!

I have always loved Egypt and the weather in the UK has been so wet and painful (yes, the weather hugely affects my CRPS) we needed some sunshine and warmth. Everyone thought we were mad and that it couldn't be done... How wrong they were, yes, I'm smug! 

We were taking off from Heathrow, but rather than have the phaff of having the car at the airport we decided a taxi would be best. Everything was packed and we had purchased an off-road wheelchair and bag for taking it as luggage... One problem, the bag broke before we'd even left the house! Mum and I were visibly stressed about what came next... Taking my scooter had to be one of the toughest things. I hate being pushed and regularly can't use my chair as my left hand is affected. Reaching the airport problem number 2, disabled assistance - after contacting the COO of Heathrow last year we had a mobile number to call. Apparently it was all in the system and wee would have VIP service... Well, we called the mobile number once at the airport and Mum got a rather surly answer saying we would have got assistance anyway... hmmm, odd, we tried the 'Info' point with the Disabled Badge and no-one answered... LESSON 1 - ALWAYS triple check your assistance has been booked in, and complain if you don't get the service you need. 

We had decided due to the pain I experience when flying to travel business class. This was my first time travelling business class. Having a separate check-in is the first bonus, everything went really smoothly. Bare i mind we left enough time to check-in 3hrs before our flight! LESSON No. 2 - Leave plenty of time!!

Once through in the terminal we were disappointed with the restaurant options... Everything either cost a fortune or was overly fancy, all we wanted was somewhere to have a nibble and a drink... One bonus was that I managed to get my step-mum's birthday present sorted! Finding somewhere we managed to get a bite and an awful coffee, we waited for the gate to come up. When the gate was up it was of course one of that gates MILES away - LESSON 3 - leave at least 20 mins to get to the gate! Once at the gate we chatted to a few fellow disabled passengers who were admiring my scooter. We then went through to the plane and thanks to the check-in girl we were right in the front row. Giving me room to stretch out during the flight. There was some muttering among staff about the scooter battery. Everything I have read and the manufacturer's advice is that the battery comes on board with you and the scooter go down to the hold. Then for the dreaded moment arrived... The minute the plane door closed and the cabin pressurised my pain kicked off and it was almost unbearable... Great! Here goes! Luckily I had timed all my drugs to cover me for the duration of the flight. 

The other bonus of business class is the seats... being able to lie almost flat makes it much easier to curl up in a ball and withstand the flight. By the time we landed in Cairo I was a mess. I just managed to get myself together to get on the scooter and get through the airport. To our surprise and wonder our Discover Egypt rep was almost air-side to meet us! Whizzing us through Immigration and out to the waiting mini-bus! We have never received service like it! Arriving at the hotel in the dark we were whizzed to our room which was a great size and two lovely comfy twin beds. Needing some dinner we ordered an Egyptian Meze and opened our Moet! 

Waking up next morning we headed out to breakfast... coming out into the grounds of the hotel I stopped dead.... Looking up the Great Pyramid was looming up out of the desert in front of me!!! We went over to the main restaurant and sat out in the sun looking up at the Pyramid stunned by the beauty and magnificence. Having planned a day of rest following the flight we enjoyed our breakfast and headed back to the room to get swimsuits so we could flop by the pool. LESSON 4 - Always leave a rest day post flight! Wanting to start our Cairo adventure we wanted to head to the Sound and Light Show at the pyramids. The mini-bus and we pilled in - me slightly over-excited about being in Cairo. We pulled out of the hotel into the Cairo traffic, WOW what an experience. I presume they have laws but I'm not sure anyone actually abides by them! It's more like 'See a Gap and Go' it was quite an introduction to Cairo! We arrived at the site where the Light Show was, got our tickets and proceeded inside, our Discover Egypt rep fending off well wishing Egyptians offering to push me in my chair. We reached almost the front of the rows of chairs, and our Rep said he would be back just before the end.

Watching the light show was magnificent!!! The incredible power of human engineering  is awe-inspiring and the history so fascinating! So much so it's very hard to take it all in in one go! Just as he had said the Rep came back to get us and we headed back to the hotel where we headed to one of three restaurants - the Egyptian one - feeling quite wiped out we had a main course and then headed back to our room and with an early start we went straight to bed. 

Not quite sure what terrain we would be encountering we took both the scooter and the wheelchair with us. We must have looked slightly mad at breakfast! Enjoying a hearty breakfast - the Egyptians do better pastry than the french! - we then headed up to reception to meet Mostafa (our Discover Egypt Rep) and our guide Mohamed who is an Egyptologist. We got into the mini-bus and had a fascinating lesson in the history of Egypt - I had totally under-appreciated how complicated and advanced Egypt's history is! When the rest of the world were bumbling round living in caves, the Egyptians had an entire civilisation and Empire! Arriving at the Cairo Museum we pilled out - with scooter - and headed in to the Museum...

Now something I have yet to touch on is security! I have never seen such tight security and felt so safe. Everywhere you turn people are pleased to see you. They want tourists to come... Its amazing! After passing through the security we were sat outside the Museum admiring some of the pieces kept outside in the grounds. Passing through the door the amount of exhibits was mind-blowing!!! Mohamed showed us the main pieces in the museum, which includes 3 tonnes of gold - Tutankhamen's' Treasure! We were able to easily navigate the museum in the scooter BONUS! However the big new is that they are building a new purpose built museum which will house the some 14 million piece collection! The statues will stay at the current museum, therefore creating two fabulous reasons to head to Cairo!!! We could have stayed there all day there was so much to see!!! All the more reason to go back ;) 

Moving on from the museum we headed to a restaurant for lunch. Felfal has been in Cairo for 100 yrs and it is stunning. You are greeted by a very unassuming entrance wheeling through the door I was greet by a beautiful courtyard with outdoor kitchen and the most fabulous carved sliding doors. Passing through the carved doors you enter another fabulous courtyard with cheery tables and chair and a vine roof!! The traditional Egyptian Lunch was huge in comparison to what Mum and I normally eat, but seriously good food! Once we had stuffed ourselves we went out into the warmth of the beautiful Cairo Sun. Hauling back into the mini-bus we headed out to the Pyramids!!! Luckily our Discover Egypt rep had fixed it so that we could drive up to each of the viewing points... Sitting at the base of the Pyramids I realised how superb the Egyptians were and how their engineering allowed these almost alien structures to survive thousands of years! You cannot convey the beauty and magnificence of them on paper, only by seeing them do you understand the awe people describe. Even pictures don't truly show their beauty. For a giggle we even got photobombed by a Camel!! 

I had wanted to try and see the souks as well but realistically I was too tired - LESSON 4 - Pace yourself! Make sure when you travel you do everything you want... but plan a realistic itinerary, give yourself time! Once back at the hotel I was able to have a kip by the pool before dinner. That night we tried the much talked about Indian Restaurant, supposedly the best in Cairo. The food was amazing but we chickened out and went for medium spice... for me and Mum? Slightly too mild for Mum and I but beautiful despite that! As it was our last night in Cairo we decided to have a drink in the main area with the pyramid looming up over us... 

Part 2 of the adventure to follow....

Wow, everytime I do a log post I end up leaving it longer... 

Things are so full on and so tiring I get so shattered it's hard to keep on top of it! 

Once back from Edinburgh life got pretty crazy with the Horses! Taking Kev out BS and Tom to his first couple. Kev is jumping nicely but still having at least 1 fence down every time... It's driving me mad! Last competition I could hardly touch his mouth so this time round we are trying a Hackmore and Rubber Mullen Mouth loose ring... we'll see how that goes! Tom had been going well but we've hit a snag. His first competition he was a real sweetheart, genuinely nervous, but he jumped lovely and was nice and bold the second time... almost too bold! The snag came after Christmas.

Christmas was tough this year ass we had to go down to see my Gran in the nursing home... SCREW THAT when I get old... it's so awful! There is nothing to her, so much so that she is literally skin and bone... It's horrendous. But she's my Granny and not only do I adore her, but she's family... You go more than physically and mentally possible for family...  

Christmas was also tough as I managed to sew myself to my sewing machine making a Christmas Present! So rather than the evening being spent making Christmas Presents it was spent in the JR waiting to have it pulled out. Unfortunately wit CRPS you are advised not to have injections or anything of the sort on your affected side, therefore we had to forgo the Local Anaesthetic and have it pulled out on Gas and Air and my painkillers. This involved being held down by Mum and a nurse whilst the Dr pulled it out! I got through it, just, but it resulted in an increase in pain which I am trying to adjust too. Unfortunately this horrible damp weather results in increased pain as well so my body is fighting on all fronts. 

New Years eve was spent having dinner with Mum and my best friend Yoli (who have been my total rock, couldn't wish for a better friend!) We consumed plenty of Champagne and then spent New Years Day lounging around watching movies and taking a much needed PJ Day!

However it was swiftly back to reality, with a manic January! The pain has made riding more difficult but we've out and about :) Kev went to Addington and jumped the 1.05 nicely but being unable to touch his mouth meant I couldn't collect him enough for the Uprights. Round two on Tuesday! Mum then went to her best friends and Daddy came up to step in and be driver :) Luckily we were taking Tom who loves going out and just stands in the lorry like an Angel... Unfortunately, much to my surprise, he has started stopping again. He stops for no reason and nothing I seem to do makes a difference. Hopefully after jumping Kev tomorrow I'll be able to focus more on getting Tom sorted. 

Super Mum (aka Super Push) also excelled herself in helping Yoli move house! Wow that was a task and a half. But she managed and Yoli is all settled in her new place. However a note here about travelling round London... I understand that London is busy and that accommodating someone on a mobility scooter or in a wheelchair is difficult but there is NO excuse for the behaviour we encountered. On the Saturday we went out for something to eat, we were planning to go to an Italian my friend had been to before called Luna Rossa. However here is where I name and shame! We approached and Mum went in to get a table. We were offered a table downstairs... which was ridiculous as there was one in the window. The waiter conferred with a colleague who looked at me and then waved his hand in dismissal. Not only this but he looked at me as if I were a piece of faeces on the bottom of his shoe. It's hard enough being in the scooter let alone people treating you like that. I decided I couldn't face giving them any money, I asked Mum o go and explain to the head waiter so that the member of staff could be dealt with. I know better than anyone how awkward it is being in a scooter but it doesn't give ANYONE the right to treat me like that. 

 and we went round the corner to newly opened tapas restaurant. 

So... we have always loved Scotland and having most of my strongest memories up here it feels like home... The minute I first set foot in Edinburgh I knew I'd love it always... It still remains my favourite city on the planet.... 

However, this trip (half-way through) has already been enlightening, hard, exhausting but mostly magical! I cannot praise Virgin Trains enough!! We chose to go with an upgrade and travelled first class but most importantly the staff were incredible! The journey itself was lovely, relaxing and stress-free! Who knew that existed! Got into Waverly and again the staff were beyond helpful! I knew then I'd come home...

We are staying at the Fraser Suites and I cannot shout about it enough! It's right opposite the Cathedral yet silent at night and with the original single pane glass! It's also nice and dark at night (much to Mum's delight! I'd rather sleep with the curtains open!). As always we are far too adventurous and yesterday happily tootled off to the Zoo )I may be 27 but I still LOVE Zoo's particularly those at the forefront of conservation and science! So be forewarned... It's on a Hill... A bloody steep one! Now Percy the scooter had already spent 45 mins tootling down Rose Street to try and find somewhere for breakfast (that didn't have loads of steps). The Zoo trip started great, we managed to see Wild Hunting Dogs, Penguins <3 and the Panda's. When we were playing with my new Penguin friend I noticed the battery wasn't holding at full... We went and plugged Percy in in the Penguin Cafe for a bit hoping to increase his oomph... Unfortunately I had drained him more than we thought! We saw the Taiper's, Rhino's, Zebras and Monkeys (to name but a few) plus a Wallaby or two... Unfortunately the hill steepens as you go up to the tigers and lions... Percy was almost dead at this point and needed a hand... In come Susan Glenn pushing pro.... we managed to get to the Lion's but not the tigers... (there's always next time). Coming back down Percy picked up a bit and we saw Sun Bears, Otters and some Baboons... We plugged in whilst I hopped round the gift shop in the hope that it would give us enough power to get bac on the bus where we could plug him in again...

We managed and thus managed to get back to the room for a rest before dinner and Passenger!!! We headed to Maison Bleu for dinner, having eaten here previously with my cousin Emma we were excited as we remembered it to be amazing food... We were in no way disappointed! The place is fab, food is incredible (Haggis Balls in Whiskey Sauce <3) and the staff were amazing! After filling up we tootled off to Usher Hall to see Passenger... We both LOVE the band and the songs... His words are incredible... What we didn't necessarily brace for was the tears and the wounds it would open.... There is a song called 'Everything' its amazing but it breaks me... I know that the CRPS is now part of my life but it doesn't take away what I know I've lost... Not permanently as I cannot be defeated, but still finding a new  way to do everything is hard and tiring BUT it can be done. Tom proved this on Monday night before we headed to Scotland.

Secondly it hurt because I truly realised how invisible I am... I know those who love me will try to say this isn't true, etc. etc. etc. but it is... My disability and scooter make me invisible to anyone under 40... Passenger was full of couples and whilst I am terrified of being touched (and don't have time or energy for the stress a relationship brings) it makes you  miss that close connection with someone, but realising I was totally invisible was hard, I'd known it all along but there were several moments at the gig that confirmed it... I needed Whiskey! We headed to The Albannach their Whiskey list is amazing! I could have spent the whole night there working my way through them but we settled for an old favourite Glenmorganie 15yrs... When back at the room tow emotional wrecks managed to get a wee bit of sleep nd Percy managed to get charged up ready for day two! 

Again we asked alot of Percy... First stop breakfast! We headed to The Hub and had a great breakfast with good coffee!!! We then headed down to the National Scottish Gallery to see a fashion exhibition... Well, we stumbled upon an amazing Natural History Exhibition too! I could have spent a whole day there is was fascinating!!! But we had also planned to head to the National Portrait Gallery to see the Portrait of the Year... Sounds great BUT they are on opposite sides of Edinburgh! Thank god we managed to get Percy on charge whilst we had lunch... we made it round the gallery and JUST made it back to the room... I don't know about Percy needing to be charged I needed to recharge, that pain is so wearing even if your taking your drugs right and not hopping etc... You need to face the fact you can't keep going endlessly... 

After a rest we headed back over to George Street to see the fabulous light installation in all its glory! It was amazing! We also needed to head to Jenners (so unbelievably happy its still there). Mum is set up with a new mascara and I'm all set with my new Chanel Coco Rouge lip pen. Again Percy ran out of Puff so no German Markets for us! We'll have to do them on Sunday before we head back! 

Back in the room two exhausted Scooter team members and a puffed out Percy need to recharge! Here's to the next instalment... Crief here we come <3

So today we tootled off to Addington Manor EC for the British Seniors. Our adventure technically started yesterday when we went to pick up the box. As we are still on the Lorry hunt we hire a 3.5t from Bicester Horseboxes (who I can't recommend enough, Brad is great and the boxes are lovely!) Everything was going swimmingly. We got up not super early, I just about managed, unfortunately mornings aren't my best moments due to the drugs I have to take. Unfortunately as we were getting the box out, Mum misjudged how close Tom's car was and we had a bit of a bump, however not the end of the world (Mum stop beating yourself up). 

We loaded Kev, who thought about a tantrum and then thought better of it... I think he was secretly quite pleased to be going to a party :) Once on the road we bumbled along happily according to Mr.Blackberry Sat Nav (bloody phone!!! My Samsung is in for a screen repair!) to discover that my blackberry thinks Addington Manor EC is on Addington Rd in Buckingham!!! Luckily I had enough signal to get the Addington Manor EC Postcode up... Round 2! We finally arrived (minor panic as I was still expecting it to be outside and there was no life, of course its moved indoors numpty!) We got there just in time to Register for the Disco, not quite what I was planning -  hoping to get 5 double clears in Bristish Novice and Discovery. Today was not to be the day.  

'Proud Mum Moment' - Kev was an angel in the box, stood happily eating his hay whilst Mum went and registered me... He's obviously learning :) he didn't barge past me as I walked him down the ramp either!! Got tacked and headed up to the arena, one of the course builders kindly talked me through the course. The warm-up as always was a bit cramped but its fine we managed, Kev is a star in that respect he's never reacted or over-reacted either. He warmed up nicely if slightly keen, bless him! We went in and jumped a satisfactory round. Wasn't my best wasn't his best... He was quite strong which made striding and turning quite tricky. I won't lie, after fence 3 I was in agony. We got round but unfortunately, I over pushed for the plank fence and we knocked it. Oh well, it wasn't to be! 

I had hoped to may be jump the 1.05 but unfortunately the pain made that impossible, having forgotten to take any Oxy with us, what a numpty!! I went down to the nice quiet outdoor arena to walk off. We were walking round nicely when a young chap on a green mare was given a lead into the arena. He was warming up and I said I'd be happy to lead him up to the indoor if needed... I was amazed, 2 years on from the Psycho I had previously been riding I'm now riding an amiable, willing , trusting steed, who I can now trust to be a lead.... People who know Kev from his previous self will be floored by this information! 

'Proud Mum Moment 2' - We took Kev back to the lorry, untacked and let him stand with some hay whilst we had a much needed sustenance, he stood happily munching away, what a star! He then loaded like a legend! I'm enjoying the new Kev :) and excited for our future!! 

Now for Mr.Tom..... that's going to be interesting! 

It's amazing how life flashes by and time flies! 

It's not been easy moving from brilliant sunshine and fairly warm to freezing cold, although the real problems come with the fog and the damp, rain is excruciating! I seriously hope this winter will be cold not wet!! Aside from the CRPS I've struggling with feeling pretty rotten and plenty of migraines - not fun. Blood tests next week just to check everything is in order but something isn't right... I've suddenly had a nasty outbreak of acne style spots all across my back and as we know your skin is more often than not an indicator for liver function. Migraines are also plaguing me, hence the cat on the head! He's such a funny thing seems to know when I'm hurting, he always wants to be touching me. Such a poppet! 

I'm lucky in that I have the boys on an amazing yard and Liz is wonderful although both are feeling very fit and happy! The younger one had a fit yesterday rodeoing round the field because all the other horses cantering around and then there's poor Kev... I can feel he is as bored as sin and needs to get out... fingers crossed we've found someone to do a lorry got a few promising leads!! Hopefully I'll get him out competing next week. Seems such a waste with the Cherwell Competition Centre just down the road! 

The work with Liz Launder at Hartpury is wonderful! Liz is great at realising how and where I can take the pressure off my leg, hip and pelvis... bloody CRPS!! I won't let it define me or prevent me from riding. We are now working on a seated jumping position, Tom seems to be getting on OK with it but he wasn't sure to begin with, think we should nick name him 'buck-a-roo'! i'm still hoping to get him out but without a big lorry and someone to drive we're a bit stuck at the moment. Back to Hartpury, the therapy centre is incredible! They've  got two mechanical horses Hercules and Margret. Hercules is the more traditional horse doing walk, trot, canter and gallop, great to start on! The there's the new addition to the team, Margret, she is amazing! Three screens sit in front of her and she can complete numerous dressage moves and jump. Anything from simple beginner jumping cross poles in a straight line to advanced jumping round a decent course of jumps! They also have a fab gym with Liz working on a treatment room. 

I've put up a great video on my YouTube Channel: 

https://youtu.be/x5vbzytRtIU

I promise I won't leave it so long now! 

Since my accident life with the horses has been the one thing to keep me going.... Despite the fact that it was because of them that the CRPS was triggered! Oh the irony! 

I've ridden properly since the age of 3 and had horses since the age of 7... I think my father secretly hoped it would be a 'phase' but alas, I was hooked... For Life.... After my CRPS started I held off riding for 6 months, for my parents, but despite this the CRPS got worse and continued to spread (IT DOESN'T ALWAYS DO THIS!) so inspired by a very important person in my life, the Race Director of Dirty Dozen Races, I got back on.

Since then despite the increasing pain I have stubbornly ridden nearly every day.... I will admit it is excruciating, but I have to balance the  pain with the mental strength being back in the Saddle has given me, I find it makes me stronger and want to fight harder. We moved yards 3 months ago and it has been the best thing I could have ever done, for me, for Mum and for the boys. We are now based at Ginny Howe's yard, she's an amazing rider and professional Eventer. The atmosphere is incredible and Liz Howe (Ginny's Mum) who runs the livery side is fantastic, neither of the horses can bully her like the did Mum, they get away with nothing!

Kevin 'aka Psycho' has changed into this mega competition horse who couldn't respect me more. Its amazing the change in him! And the young horse Tom, is slowly getting it, he still isn't aware that he is 18hh and can't walk on top of you! But we're getting there, I'm not sure he's actually aware of where his feet are or what they are doing half the time... Although I am beginning to wonder if he watched the Rio Show Jumping, as like a lot of the horses, he thinks its funny to buck when he lands... He's got a huge jump anyway, let alone bucking after it!!! I've also been looking at ways for being more secure in the saddle and Rimell's Saddlery in Shipston has played a huge part. Rob, the saddler has helped me adapt my saddle and created an amazing strap to help secure my leg, whilst the team are great to brainstorm with about what we can do to make life easier etc. Thanks to them riding is that wee bit more manageable!

The photo above was my last outing with Kev, we went to RDA Nationals to represent Garsington. He was mega! It's by far the biggest thing he's done, staying away from home for a night then competing in such a lively atmosphere! But I cannot praise him enough. We cam 3rd in our showjumping, which was immense considering I couldn't warm up properly (over-crowded warm-up arena) we were clear in a time of 38 secs, which I thought was too quick (he was a wee bit excited) but two people went faster than me, this didn't bother me. He jumped a beautiful round which I deemed too quick, and out at a British Showjumping Competition probably would have been too quick, but considering the atmosphere and lack of warm up this isn't suprising. We then had the dressage element of our combined training, which the earlier SJ round counted towards, and in which we came 2nd.

Now I'm a stickler for tradition with dressage, horses should be plaited! So I plaited up, not my best by any means but they did the job, however the plaiting caused the CRPS in my left hand an arm to flare up... I was already in agony because of my Leg and Back but now my hand... Great! I got tacked up and down to the arena, we didn't have enough time to warm up so the already wired Kev was as strong as an Ox!! Brilliant, pain now completely off the scale, it took two Oxycodon quick release tablets to detach my pain enough for me to continue. However, this meant continuing biting my lip, whilst tears streamed down my face, fighting to just stay conscious! How we got through that test I will never know, but we did, nowhere near the level that he is capable of though. Poor Kev was beside himself at this point as he could clearly sense my pain, we got back to the stable block and as I got off I collapsed. Luckily my Dad was there to catch me, whilst Mum got Kev in the stable, Dad carried me to my mobility scooter. Through the pain all I could think of was poor Kev. Mum and Dad dealt with him brilliantly whilst my Step-mum cared for me.... Without the three of them I couldn't have done any of it and it meant the world to me that they were all there supporting me. 

Whilst I'll admit that RDA Nationals was one of the worst 'attacks' I've had pain wise, it is also one of my proudest moments. I did it, despite everything, I did it and came home with a 3rd and 2nd.... It just shows that with willpower and belief you can achieve anything you want. CRPS doesn't have to stop you...

Following on from this I have returned to Hartpury as an alumni and patient. I am working with Liz Launder who is an Osteopath and the therapy centre team with the aim of figuring out how to bio-mechanically make this more bearable, whilst improving my riding. When I was at Uni there, we had 'Hercules' the mechanical horse, who whilst great is now fairly basic in comparison to latest technology. So Hartpury have now got 'Margret' who is immense. She does advance dressage movements and jumps all whilst evaluating your seat and rein pressure! It highlighted that whilst I cannot use my left leg or weightbare through it I actually have it in a better position than my right.... It also highlighted that although I stay fairly central in my seat my weight-distribution is unequal and that my left rein pressure is reduced because of the pain. I can't wait to see where this will take me! There are some video's from the session on my Facebook page.

I cannot stress enough that whilst the reality of riding is that my pain increases, sometimes beyond what I can cope with, but it does me more good mentally. It makes me stronger, gives me a drive and more importantly makes me feel normal. There are very few places I feel 'normal' one is on the back of a horse and the other is with my Dirty Dozen Family, everywhere else the reality is that I feel and I am 'disabled'. Without realising it, people always 'pander'  to my every movement or action and I hate it... I'll bloody say if I can't do it! That's where DD and riding are different its not 'are you sure you can do it?', I get left to it on the assumption that I can do it and if I can't do it, I'll pipe up and say. I know people do it because they care and they worry but that is partly what makes it so much worse, I don't want people to have to worry, I want to be independent and not pigeon holed as disabled. I know technically I am, and I want people to recognise it, but I don't want to be treated like I can't do anything all the time. 

If your reading this and recognise it in yourself, find a happy place that makes you mentally stronger, even if its in a swimming pool, doing yoga or simply getting out of the house, do it, you can I promise! On the flip side if your reading this and you recognise someone you love... Unless they ask for help don't fuss or faff it doesn't help, just be there in case.